Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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