apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
