i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Church boner. Awkwardddd
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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