Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
