dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
