You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
