can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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