Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
