new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
