That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
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