why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Still dying that you shit outside
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize