I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
