so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
