My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
