my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
