remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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