walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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