Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
So much rum. So many feels.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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