dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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