Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
