And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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