haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
