As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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