I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
