I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
