Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
