I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
