he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I party with great urgency now.
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