How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
