Can Purell be used as lube?
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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