so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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