Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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