if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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