There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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