Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
