Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
