I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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