Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize