Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
