I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
