I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
