so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Randomize
