That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
