When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
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