hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
