I have demons in me.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
