i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
