well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
