I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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