She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Randomize
